I wait for it to come back.
While I stand outside mourning the time I’ve lost,
I stare at the wide sky.
As I find my way through this view,
I realize how painful the day can be,
How hard it is to cope with who I am and what I have to live.
I realize how much I try to define myself but only fail.
The sun does not shine; it burns me, confuses me and messes with my mind.
The clouds no longer comfort me; there is no way to get out.
I’m drowned into this misery, my own despair.
As I blame myself for my entire struggle, lightning hits the earth,
Though the instant is now gone, in my mind the image seems to perpetuate.
This sight can only be deceiving, for nothing is as it seems.
I dare not take this image out of me,
for ‘tis the only true reflection of my anxiety.
I wish for the day to stop putting obstacles on my path,
‘Cause soon I won’t be able to stand and I might as well just give up.
At the same time, I wish I was stronger
And I wish I didn’t let the sun take over my worries.
Just as the night doesn’t seem to have an end, this day seems to be eternal.
Can’t think of anyone or anything that would help me cease my pain,
As seconds expire this feeling becomes stronger, just as if lightning had struck on me.
My ill heart keeps beating, but my soul, my soul is misplaced.
At last, the sun seems to stop burning, as it starts to vanish from the scene,
The longed night is now approaching,
and although my pain will not go away, my thoughts are still misleading, and my heart still aches,
I still have hope for a better tomorrow.
P.D. I wrote this a long time ago, and a close friend used it as his homework. It reflected how I felt at the time and he got and A, so it served the purpose. Why is it here? It's pretty much how I feel right now, overwhelmed, frustrated, worried and confused.
Feliz Cumpleaños a Samuel Pelaez en Bogotá.
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